The Wait Is On ...

... and I don't really like it. It's been just about a week since we learned our baby had no heartbeat. At the advice of my doctor, I didn't go to work since we found out and I am kinda wishing I did. I feel so inadequate. That is the only way I can describe things ... having babies is supposed to be the most natural thing a woman does. And I can't do it. Or at least I don't have a "successful outcome". It sucks. I am sad and want things to be different. I want this miscarriage to just happen so we can move on. I've been doing way to much research online and am petrified of what it's going to be like. There is a part of me that wishes we had just done things right away, taken the misoprostol and had it happen immediately. Waiting is hard. Harder than I thought and yet at the same time, could be much worse. I feel almost numb to the whole thing. I am quite sure that when it happens, I won't feel the same way. But for now, I feel numb and probably in denial. BOO.