Hi Toot,

My little June bug! I never thought I'd end up with a June baby, yet here it is, June 1! Where did the time go?!

So my sweet Toot ... today is the day the doctors are going to start the process of inducing labor. I had so hoped you'd decide on your own that you were ready to come out, but that's okay ... it just proves you're our baby - stubborn like your mom and late like your dad :) Just know that if I could, I would keep you with me forever. I feel like I am kicking you out of your cozy, safe home, and I'm sorry for that. I would love to keep you with me, but the doctors aren't giving me much of a choice ... my brain knows that they are probably right, but my heart feels heavy ...

I feel like there is so much to say to you today, yet I don't know where to begin. You've been kicking like crazy all weekend and it never fails to make me smile! You've been such a joy to me and your dad these last forty weeks Toot. We love you so much. You are truly an inspiration and not just to me. To everyone that knows about you. Your dad and I feel so lucky to have been chosen as your parents. You have been such a gift and I can only hope that we get a little more time with you ... we are so excited to finally meet you!!

I have to thank you Toot. You have truly given me the strength to muddle through this journey. You give me purpose in life, you make me get out of bed every day and you have truly made me a different (and I hope better) person. I cannot thank you enough for all you have done. You've changed me and I love you for it.

If I'm being truly honest, I fear myself without you. I fear the emptiness of knowing you're not in my belly anymore. I fear that without you, I won't know who I am or what my purpose is. I fear that if we have to say goodbye, it will break me. I fear that you won't know how much I love you, or that I would have done anything to take this away for you ... and I'm sorry for all the tears today sweet girl. Please don't think I'm sad to meet you, trust me, I have been waiting for this day my whole life. You're my daughter! And I long to hear your sweet little cry and I long to hold you and rock you and show you just how much you are loved ... so the tears are tears of love, tears of fear and tears of uncertainty. And I cannot seem to stop them!

I love you Toot. It doesn't seem adequate enough, but I do. And if I have to fit an entire lifetime's worth of love into just a few moments, so be it. But know that I truly love you with all my heart. That carrying you has been the most wonderful gift and that a piece of you will forever be with me. Always.

I love you.

Love always,
Mom

P.S. Rabbits Rabbits! Binkie says that on the first of every month, and it's supposed to bring good luck, so it's tradition in our family to say it to everyone on the first of the month, every month ... so Rabbits Rabbits my sweet girl!!